It’s not all about you.

So this first part isn’t actually about the topic of this blog post, but I have some explaining to do.

I apologise for not blogging every week as I said I would do when I started this back up again. But, I have a good excuse! I had surgery.

Not major surgery, just a tonsillectomy. Though I doubt the word ‘just’ has any place in that sentence. And I have been in a LOT of pain for a week now. Like, ‘shoot me now’ pain, at least in the morning or during the night when it’s at it’s worst.

Today, all of a sudden, I can swallow without it feeling like I’m eating pieces of glass and knives instead of whatever ‘normal food’ I should be eating.

Did you know that you’re not allowed to just eat jelly and ice cream during recovery anymore? Me neither. Until I was informed that if I didn’t eat ‘normally’ I would most likely get an infection in the second week of recovery and start bleeding. Fun.

So I’ve been especially good and haven’t deviated from my usual diet or what the rest of my family is eating, all except snacks. I think this reprieve from the extreme pain today is probably a reward for that. (Or maybe not, just as I typed that my throat decided to randomly stab itself in pain. Ouch)

Anyway, that’s my excuse. I think it’s a pretty good one if I do say so myself.

So, back to the topic.

Recently, me and my twin sister got our hair cut. I just got a normal straighten out the fringe, some off the end, neaten up. She however, decided to get her hair cut shorter, into almost a bob. It looks lovely.

Now my first thoughts were along the lines of ‘Oh, she looks really good with a bob. That means I’ll look good with a bob. Cool, new hairstyle I can go for. Now, how many people are going to ask us if she got that so that other people can tell us apart?’

It was one of my first thoughts. Which made me think. We get asked that a lot.

Pretty much any time either one of us gets a new hairstyle, or changes something about our appearance that makes us look more different, we get asked that.

Now, I suppose it’s a fair question, but it does annoy me for a couple of reasons.

1. It makes it seem like everything I do in my life revolves around my being a twin. Where I go to university, what job I get, (a lecturer actually asked us ‘how we would handle it’ if we didn’t manage to get jobs in the same company… Like we would have to be with each other all the time to survive or something) or anything else.

And 2. It makes it out like you (the person who’s asking) thinks that we should focus all of our changes on how to make it easier on other people who barely know us to tell us apart. Or how we should think of you AT ALL when deciding how to most make us look different.

I know I don’t have to try to look different to the people that matter. Most, if not all of my close friends say that, though they thought we were absolutely identical when they first met us, now they now us better we look completely different. Sometimes they’re not even sure that we’re identical.

You see, we don’t do it to look different. We do it because we want a change. Just like any other singleton would.

I mean, we do have a rule that if one of us has a big change and the other likes it, we have to leave a fair amount of time before we do it ourselves. But that’s mostly down to how other people will comment on us ‘doing the same thing because we’re twins’ or that it’s just nice to get sole attention for a big change once in a while. Like the spotlight is on you, not both of us, just for one moment. It’s nice.

Eventually I would like to get a new haircut without getting those comments, and maybe one day I will. Probably when I don’t live with or near my sister any more. But for now, I just have to keep on grinning and replying politely.

Ah the life of a twin.


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