This might be a short post, but we’ll see how it goes.
With around a month left of my life as a student there have been a fair few articles about ‘things you wish you had done at uni.’ Even my mum says things like ‘you don’t want to end university and do wish you’d gone out more.’
But I can’t do everything that I want to do. And I shouldn’t feel bad if I don’t. If I regret not going out as much, then I do. There’s nothing I can do about it now. But I’ve worked hard and studied to get the grade I want. That has to come with a trade off for something.
Of course I wish I’d done some things during university: had a long term relationship, slept with someone, fallen in love, hung out with my friends more, stressed less (though I’m starting to think that last one is just impossible), but I can’t go back in time and do things differently. And how do I know if I did that things would automatically be better? I could just as easily regret a completely different set of things.
Focusing on our regrets just makes us sad and keeps us in the past. I don’t know where I’m going to be in ten years time. But I’m sure that whatever I’m doing now is part of leading me towards it.
My mum always said she wanted to be a doctor. But she has no regrets, whatever she did lead her to have her family, and if she had been a doctor she may have never had us. And she would never change her life now.
That’s what I want. Assurance and happiness in where I end up. I don’t know where that will be and I don’t really care, as long as I’m happy and content where I am.
So anyway, if you’re in university or are about to go, or wherever you are in your life, ignore those stories about regrets or ‘things you wish you had done.’
There is no ‘right way’ to live life. It’s impossible to miss out on things you ‘should’ have done, as there is really nothing that anyone is obligated to do in their lives.
Just focus on where you are now. Hopefully it’s somewhere nice. I need to remember that myself.